Ep44: Bianca Carrasco, Her Disappearance and Heartfelt Search for Answers ~ with Jovanna & Rosa

We didn't grow up like it was an easy childhood. Bianca grew up with we grew up with our mother. I think she was in third grade, 2nd, 3rd grade.

So that would be what? Eight or nine years old. Our mother sent her to to our biological father, and I ended up following a little bit after, but after that, it wasn't a really easy it's never been easy for us, childhood wise, when we got into teenage years. Starts to get really hard just trying to cope with everything.

She got a little bit rebellious, and I say a little bit she got rebellious, and she actually has a baby, or she's not a baby anymore. She's a big girl now, but our father made her give a baby up for adoption right when she was turning 17. So there's a lot of stories within that.

Big story, but there's just a lot. Thank you. I know Rosa.

Rosa, if you can help. I've shared a lot with Rosa. I've been really open.

I know Bianca has, too. Whenever you come from rough backgrounds, it's not like you don't know where to start. It's just hard to talk about.

It's hard for me to talk about it. And it was in a situation that I went through. But being her friend and her telling me about everything in her past and opening up about it, especially the topic of the baby that her daughter that she had to give up for adoption like that, that was really hard for her to talk about, for her to deal with up until the week before she went missing.

Yeah, because, see, I went to go visit her in March, 2 months before she went missing. I was down there for spring break with her, and she was telling me stories about her then because, of course, now what does she turn 18 this year? Jovana? I think she just turned 19. Yeah, 19 the 1 July.

So, I mean, just her being getting older, getting to an age to where she wanted to have that opportunity to reach out, to let her know who she is, how she can contact her, she wanted that relationship. So that was a tough conversation to deal with. It was a hard topic for her, which I felt like had a lot to do with life in general for her.

Yeah, I agree. Again, why I wanted to have Rosa on this one, is that for me? And maybe this will help you in the interview, is that obviously, it's been seven years, and she is still no trace, no nothing. And there's a lot of judgment, a lot of stories, speculations, all these things.

And for me, in the beginning, when she went missing, it was really hard because you don't know what to say or what not to say, and you're looking out for you don't want to hurt people saying things or even hurting her. I wanted to protect her, but it's gotten to the point where it's like, I don't know what God's will is in this, but what I do know is that she still has a story to tell. There's still a lot of things leading up to her disappearance that if we can share who she was, why she was that way, the beautiful things that she overcomed and the things that she accomplished, that it really could help other people and really show empathy, show examples of ways to be empathetic.

How would you describe Bianca's personality? Hilarious. So funny. Yes.

Funny. Sassy. Yeah, she was blunt, but she was also very, I think, from my perspective, because I'm the bigger sister, it's like she would say these things.

She was like, blunt, but she was also so enduring and nurturing and sweet all at the same time. She was super compassionate. And so she would tell her close people exactly what she was thinking, and then you would be caught off guard with what she was saying.

But then she was so loving. She was such a loving person. My favorite thing that she would always tell me is like, you better pump your brakes.

That's how you knew she was serious. Don't go there no more. Yeah, but it was always laughing, especially with our kids, because our kids were somewhat close in age, so watching them be together, we'd laugh, we'd play with the kids.

Everybody loved music, dance, so that's what our kids would that just fun. Everything about Bianca was fun. And for us, we just had more history because she was my mean, at any point we could like which this is why I love Rosa, is that I can talk to her for know about.

Um, and it was the same with Bianca that I could just talk to her for. It wasn't it was all kinds of different things and deep things. And then when we say she's hilarious, she was like, morbidly funny.

So we always make the joke. It was from our traumatic childhood, but it was comforting. I know the joke that I make now is like, I know there is no way all the crying I've done since she's been missing, she would not be okay with at all, because definitely I was the big sister and it was like if somebody made me cry no, then she knew something was up.

You're not going to make my big sister cry, because she's the big sister. And if you made her cry, that means you did something really bad and I'm not okay with that. Yeah, she was very loyal and very protective over the people that she loved.

That's when I feel like that's when her nursing came in because she was so protective and caring. Something hurt. I don't even think I went to the doctor having like, I would just call Bianca and tell her and she was definitely my go to nurse for everything.

Everything. Scrapes, anything. Which is why it's kind of went I don't just I became a grandma at a very young age.

My baby's young. And I told Jovanna. I think that's why it was so hard for me dealing with the situation.

I literally went through a really bad depression because I felt like the one person that I needed, I didn't have. I couldn't go to her for my questions because I know she would have made it okay from the get go because she would have been like, rosa, stop it. This is happening for a reason.

And she would get real aggressive when she wanted to get through to you. No, you're not going to. As much as I could hear her saying it, it still wasn't easy.

It was hard. It was hard to deal with. But I'm so thankful for Jovana because I feel like I have a piece of my Bianca still with like she talks like Bianca.

I feel like her and Bianca sound so much alike, especially when she like they laugh the same. I'm not going to allow you to do podcasts with me anymore. Sorry.

Well, I believe Rosa is completely truthful in regards know, having a piece of Bianca. It makes a lot of sense to have that comfort in a situation like that. Thank you for sharing that story, Rosa.

I think about when she got pregnant in high school, that was so shocking to me because we were so close and I had no idea what she was doing, like skipping school and all that. I had no idea. And then if Bianca was going to do something, whether good or bad, she was going to do it.

That's it. There was no, like, if you found out about it or know. I think she knew, her people she knew who would tell her what me and Rosa have talked about, like she was private.

And that comes too from our were. We were made to put on this face that everything is okay, everything's perfect, there's nothing going on. And we learned how to do that very well.

And I honestly believe that's why there's things that people don't know or things that I found out or things from the different seasons of her life people don't know. And that's not her fault. That's what we were taught.

Definitely. I can definitely say that she picked and chose what she wanted to, like what she was comfortable with. Sharing what she was comfortable is exactly what I was telling Jovana the other day.

As I felt know because others know other things know we didn't know and then we know things that others don't know. Like I told, like, I felt like she picked and chose who she was comfortable in that situation. Not not that anybody is better than anybody.

It's just where she felt more comfortable at. And I feel like me and Jovanna being her bigger sister and then me being the person that she knew who anything the kids were sick or she was sick, I was there calling. I was checking.

She knew the worry person that I was. So I feel like a bunch of the stuff that I didn't know is for that reason, she wasn't trying to worry me. She knew I had a lot going on in my own life that I know.

She just didn't want to worry me on certain joanna says it took part. Yeah. And that's another thing too.

Whenever you come from where we come from, you don't want to burden people with your issues. And it may not be a burden for your friends or family, but it feels that way. Yes.

Everything is better in pink. Everything is better in pink. Yeah.

Yes, absolutely. That was her color. Yeah, everything was pink.

And then she liked Rosa. You sent me a text. I forgot to reply.

But it was Zane. But we had certain songs that always reminded each other of each other. Just like, from growing up or it's silly.

Remember what was la diferencia? That group? La Diferencia, one of their whole albums. And we don't speak Spanish. That's the funny part.

That's the funny part. But growing up, we always remembered it together. And so there were certain songs like that.

And she was so funny. She was really funny. Mine is what makes you beautiful from one direction.

Do you remember that one? That part when it's like you're insecure, don't know what for. And like, the flip the hair. Like, she flip her hair.

And that's what we talked about, too, when I was down there for spring break. She's like, you have to come back in August to go with me to Zane's concert. She loves Zane.

From one direction. Yeah. We have our own type of country music.

We have our own kind of Spanish music. So the Hano music. It's Spanish Texas music.

It's not just Spanish music and then country, it's like it's not regular country. It's Texas country. Yes.

For me, and it was like those old school Tejano music that you grew up with around the family that you heard. Maybe we wouldn't make jokes because we didn't understand what they were saying or the music. She was funny because she would make these dance moves just to she did love to dance.

Yes. No, but when you put northeno on, she'd be like, the gumbia. The chicken dance.

The chicken dance. It sounds like you have to do the chicken. Yes.

She loved to dance. She really did. In the same way I love to dance.

I dance to anything. It's funny. We'd be in the car, me and Bianca, and we'd be dancing.

I'm telling you. Especially to the One Direction. That was our jam.

I think this is the difference. And I know that I've talked to Rosa about this. It's not the same as losing a loved one.

Exactly. It's not the same. You don't have the closure.

You don't know. And the most hardest thing to say, knowing my sister, who she is, what she would do or wouldn't do. I don't want her to show up at my door.

I don't want a police officer saying, we found your sister, because that would have meant for seven years that she was being held against her will. And I'm not okay with that. That makes me sick to my stomach thinking about because I know my sister didn't just walk away.

I know she's a very real thing. It's very different than there are people that just walk away. There are people that are just missing.

But for Bianca, something happened to her. People know what happened to her, and they're not speaking. Set for seven years.

That crushes my heart to think about the possibility of her being alive, because that would mean something very bad has been happening to her for seven years. Right. I think the way I would answer that is not what I would do if she was to come.

My thing is what I would have changed the last time I saw her is what I feel like. Beats me up the like, maybe ask more questions because I knew something was going on, but I didn't know through her. I knew through Joe Daniel, because Joe Daniel and my husband were really good friends.

So I knew things were going on because of him. And leading to that, I would have taken it back and been like, hey, let's talk. What's going on? Can I help in some way? Something like that.

I would have hugged her tighter. I would have reminded her that I love her. I know she knew that, but to where she felt like she could come and tell me, like, rosa, this is going on.

This is happening. What do you think? I should know something. But I feel like that's how I would answer that question.

I would have done things differently. We didn't lose her. She's missing.

We can't find her. We don't have that peace. We don't have that closure.

We don't know nothing. So it's different for us in that situation. I completely understand both angles.

Giovanna, Rosa, thank you so much. Because there's times where okay, I'm sorry. There's times where you have to like it.

I'm sorry. I hold my kids a little tighter. Having that mind thought, the mind process that we are as siblings, as parents, you never know that's their last day you get to see that person.

So it really affects me that you don't expect that to happen to anyone. You don't expect anything the worst to know or just for them just to disappear without a trace. And when you brought up the thing about people knowing Jovana, knowing about her and what had happened to her and her disappearance, that infuriates me even more to know that somebody knows something and they're not saying anything.

And I am so sorry that you're going through this. It's just I don't know. It's it's totally unless in a situation like that, you'll never understand.

Never. You'll never understand unless it literally happens to you, because it's easy for everybody to well, you lost her. She's gone.

No, you can't say that to and and I feel like that's why Jovana and I have gotten so close, because her hurt is my hers is totally more and like, I tell her, I will never take the fact that you're her sister. I will never try to be better than you. I will never say, like, oh, I miss her more, or, oh, I loved her.

No, but I know Jovana hurts, and the same way I hurt. We can relate to that hurt exactly. For me, it took I mean, I don't know.

Julie set these podcasts up, but it's not easy. It's not easy to talk about because it does bring up all those things. It does.

Like, she got to this place for a reason. It's not just like you said, she didn't survive. There's more to that story.

Yes. And it takes a lot for the family to actually speak up about things, things that I told my mom today. I mean, she's in prison, and she's crying, and my whole family on both sides may hate me by the time this is all said and done, because nobody wants to talk about these really hard things.

But Bianca's not here, and there's many reasons that led up to this. She was very young still at the time that she disappeared. So I'm sorry if I come across it took me a lot to get here to actually start speaking up and speaking.

Never apologize, Giovanna, because you are doing something that your sister would have done. I think that's a lot of things in the perspective that a lot of people don't understand is that you are her voice when she is absent. So don't ever apologize for what you do.

Don't ever apologize because you're doing it with strength, and you're doing it with courage. You're in a step where a lot of other families haven't even gotten to, and it's been 20 years. It's something that the family knows, and they're hush about it because it's some kind of, like, unwritten rule that they don't let other people into their lives.

We'll deal with our own family issues and not have anyone else be involved in their lost loved ones story. So this is a huge step. Don't ever apologize.

But I'm glad that you are here to tell Bianca's story. The media takes things, and then they just go and then you I think the last two podcasts that I did, it was more of I just want to find her. Right.

I just want people to know how it got here. And I want I say I want I pray that someone somewhere has the conviction to hear things out loud and say, I need to say that's why I'm doing these podcasts. Yes.

Because it's not like I feel like what I've heard from Jovana, and I feel like I feel the same way, too. We want people to know Bianca who bianca is the person she wasn't just somebody who married her uncle and went missing, because that's what everything out there is making it sound. And that's what she means by there's a story behind it all.

It's not just she married her uncle. Right. And that was one of the things that I wanted to completely debunk or have the story to, the truthfulness of the story, because I noticed that a lot, that it was always, like, the centerpiece of conversations.

And I completely agree with y'all that that's not what defines the situation. It could be Joe Schmo from Mars, and that should have never happened to her, no matter who was involved in her regard. But I know that you want to get the record straight in regards to what had led up her story behind it, because I don't like to listen to media.

I don't like to feed into all of that because that's not coming from you. I don't see it as genuine. I see it as an attention seeking, looking for subs, trying to get clout in their whatever.

And initially, that one story was released, and everyone focused on that. Right. Everybody went with that, which it is part of the problem.

It's a little piece of the problem. But there was a very short journey there for Bianca. I'll start off with, because I've said this multiple times in other interviews, is that our mother is in prison, okay? And our father's nowhere involved trying to find her.

So that off the top, should give you some kind of clue. There's some pretty crazy things going on there, right? But I can give you all these little details and tell you that we're with our dad. It was rough.

Yeah. Rough childhood. Like, rough.

And she got pregnant at 16. That baby was born July 1. She was turning 17 July 21.

She was sent away when she got pregnant. When that happened, didn't give up this baby on her good. Like, she didn't we did not have the family support.

So she does that, gives the baby up, finishes high school, goes and tries to find our mother, who is at that point, already a felon, already in and out, doing things she shouldn't be doing. Within a short amount of time, this family, like our mother's side of the family, we didn't grow up with them. Our dad had kept us away.

So this uncle, we didn't look at him like that because we didn't grow up with our family like that. I still don't know my mother's side of the family very well. And then within a year a year.

Within a year, she gets mixed up with Joe Daniel and gets pregnant with my oldest niece. You're talking a year. So the most vulnerable, darkest, lonely nobody there.

I mean, I followed her to Odessa, but we're only 18 months apart, and she's with this man who is much older than her, and then it just goes on from there. So it's not as simple as everyone makes it out to be that she married her uncle. Thank you.

Thank you for setting that straight, because I want the truthfulness. I don't want this blown up, exaggerated story that a lot of people are going with. And I've dealt with a lot of family members on my podcast that had the same scenario being blown out of proportion about the stories of their lost loved ones or their well, it's to hide all the other skeletons that everybody else has.

Right? That's what it is. Because for me to say that, I'd have to say all these other things. So there's things that are going to come out there's things people are going to put two and two together, and it's not comfortable.

It doesn't make the families look good. But she's missing. Somebody hurt her.

She's gone. Her babies are without her. It doesn't matter.

It's time to suck up your pride and get over it. I feel like people who didn't get to know Bianca missed out. They missed out because they really did.

If you needed something, she heard somebody need something, she was right. Whatever. What do I need to do? How can I help you? That's how she was.

And that says a lot, even coming from work. That's why I want to share. People wouldn't have been like her.

They would have been mean. And she she tried to change her life and help people regardless of what she went through and how mean people were to her. That's what I told Jovana the other day.

I feel like that's what made her her, is because she chose to be different. She chose to take everything she went through, put it into something. Because I feel like nowadays, especially the generation of today, these kids use all their past trauma as excuses to why they don't do this.

They don't finish school, they turn to drugs. They do this, they do that. And that was with Bianca.

It made her strong. It made her hope. Her kids know that.

They learned that, because I know she would want them to know the same thing, to know to do the same thing. We love harder, and there's always a reason why we love harder. It's because we are trying to make up for the lost love that we didn't have in our childhood or the trauma that we had endured, that we're trying to make it a constructive instead of a destructive pattern in our lives, overcompensating for the lack of what we had received as a child.

And I feel like that's why she was the way she was with her kids, very protective of her kids. She had to be really close for you to be around them, to watch them, to take care nobody took care of Bianca's kids. That's why I wasn't buying what was happening towards the end.

Wasn't buying it. Yeah, and that's how come know. I found out through social media.

I wasn't on Facebook, but I had actually gotten a message from one of our other friends asking mean, like, reaching out to me, telling me they were sorry that they had heard about Bianca. And I was like, what about Bianca? She's like, you don't know? And I was like, no. And then she said, she's missing.

I said, what do you mean she's missing? Like, I had just talked to Bianca the night before, and that's when I get on, you know, when I call Joe Daniel, it just makes it a little bit and Bianca was but she made it. Bianca, don't joke like that, please. It was so bad.

And I'm telling you it was so bad that that Friday, be prepared what I'm about to say. That Friday, before she went missing, she made the joke to her coworkers and said, hey, if I go missing, you know what happened to me. And she probably meant it in a way, but that's how she joked.

Like, she put a smile on her face. She was trying to she would cry sometimes, and then she would laugh. Just trying to grasp the situation that's ahead of her.

Possibly. Yeah. Wow.

So in the very beginning, the last pings for her phone were right there by her house. And we did two searches, one with the community gathering, and then Texas Equicearch actually helped us search the area. And they searched the home, they searched the cars.

They had dogs. As far as the results, I'm not entirely sure that they came back clear. So, yeah, that was the search efforts.

Other than that, they haven't given us anywhere else to look. I mean, he left that night. San Antonio is 5 hours from Odessa, where he drove.

He didn't get back to San Antonio till 08:00 Monday night. Only in the media, they have said that there could be foul play. They believe there's foul play.

I was told by a homicide detective that unfortunately, if we don't find a body, there's nothing we can do. A homicide detective? CPS got involved the very first know, because the kids were left, and they were just gun ho. I mean, that's why they removed the children, was that they were convinced something happened.

But it's two different agencies. I don't know. It's super frustrating.

Missing persons in Texas is very sad because there's a lot of missings. Yes, I've noticed that as I continue to do research about San Antonio, they are very loose in their investigative practices. If they're one of the major things is, like, their missing person's unit.

They're not police officers. They're agents, so they only have so much authority in the first place. Other counties, you may have police officers and missing persons.

But as far as San Antonio goes, they're not police officers. They're limited to what they can do. So then they have to determine who they can get help from, who to reach out to.

Is it foul play? I mean, it's crazy. Something needs to be changed. For sure.

For sure. Bye.